Special Snowflake Elizabeth & Pirate Queen Emily Ruin Christmas: A Children's Tale

Not so long ago, in a land lush and green, lived Special Snowflake Elizabeth, and Emily, the Pirate Queen.

These sisters loved Christmas more than any time of year, But disaster often followed when they became too zealous in their cheer. Like when Pirate Queen Emily thought up a wheeze to move festive decor far beyond humble trees. "Trees are for schmucks!" She said with great feeling, "Let's forego the tree and trim the whole ceiling!" So they brought out the ornaments, lights and the lot, And hung them up on the ceiling, in every spot.

They glimmered quite nicely for a while, then alas! Came crashing to the floor with a shattering of glass.

"Christmas is ruined!" the Pirate Queen exclaimed, staring down at the mess with grief and disdain, "It is we who are schmucks, for hatching this plot, I've no Christmas spirit now, no, not a jot!" "We're not through yet!" Special Snowflake insisted, "There are cookies to be baked and toys to be gifted!" But they burned all the cookies and broke all the toys, It seemed they could ruin any and all Christmas joys. At last came the carol sing, hosted by the church. but they got the time wrong and were left in the lurch. They were two hours early, and after blaming and bickering, There was nothing to do but watch the advent candles flickering.

But Pirate Queen Emily grew tired of this and said, "How about an exhibition of swashbuckling instead!"

And her sword fighting skills were a thing to admire, 'Till she knocked down the candles and set the whole church on fire. The next day they were scolded by their mother severly, "You've ruined this Christmas!" she told them quite clearly. But Special Snowflake Elizabeth wasn't so sure. "I think," she said, smiling, "I can think of a cure." She burst into song, like those Whos in The Grinch But stopped when Emily gave her arm a firm pinch. "I don't think it's working, try something new." So Elizabeth thought hard 'till she knew what to do. "The manger! The shepherds! That very small horse! Jesus is the reason for the season of course!" "Christmas is saved!" she announced with a shout, But Pirate Queen Emily still looked very put out.

"Jesus is the reason! But we've burned his house down! "There's naught for it now, we'll have to leave town." So the girls packed their bags, and the townsfolk still remember How Snowflake and Pirate Queen ruined December.